How To Spot A Crazy Person

So I was in my chamber today sitting on the toilet, reading an old copy of Yesterday's News. They have a special section called "Move On." This particular issue was all about "crazy people." If you are unfamiliar with the term, I believe it was coined by Jesus Christ on an episode of "Gimme A Break!" and used to describe someone who is so crazy, it might just not be worth it to get involved in a friendship with them. This was a lesson I learned myself last year, way too late, after I had been repeatedly bombarded with this person's "crazy." For someone who is allegedly quite crazy themselves, my life is still incredibly based in reality and I am not the kind of crazy that boils over into delusional. And if it takes one to know one, well then we see where one went wrong. However, those days are DUN. I am happier and less burdened by crazy and will not be fooled again. Since I thought this was an extremely important "life lesson" for not just me, but that everyone out there can benefit from, I am going to reprint it here.

- He's got a serious case of the YOU, YOU, YOU'S. He goes above and beyond to help you with your problems because he's too afraid to fix his own.

- He never chooses happiness and thrives on his misery.

- He puts himself in places where he doesn't fit in, only so that he can fail and perpetuate his own misery.

- He associates and talks with other crazy people.

- He is old enough to have a child in his teens but remains a virgin, waiting for that "special moment."

- He is stuck in his past and emulates himself at 15 years old.

- He's "Single White Female." He gets involved in your line of work, becomes a part of your family of friends, etc.

- He "falls in love" with more than one person at a time.

- He accuses you of trying to steal his love interest when you never did any such thing -- and, in fact, turned down the opportunity to out of your friendship to him.

- His "love interest" tells him repeatedly he's not interested, but he remains certain that this will change.

- He would rather end your friendship than ask you for an explanation of what happened or give you the benefit of the doubt.

- He is told by doctors that his problem is not depression, but that his "problems are mental."

- He refuses to seek therapy even after he is told he has mental problems.

- He thinks he is Tinkerbell.

- He hates himself no matter how many times you try to show him what a beautiful crazy person he is.


The sad thing is... he's a nice guy. I miss him and his big bucket of crazy no matter how much of a battle our friendship may have been. I hope he finds happiness.