Violently Happy

So since some of you visit this page from time to time to see how I'm faring, I thought I'd let you know...

I've never been happier in my life than I am these days.

I have no idea why. I have nothing extraordinary happening in my life. I'm not making a lot more money than usual. I'm not in love. I'm not where I want to be in my career. I haven't been to a gym in months. I'm not with my parents nearly as much as I want to be.

And I could give two shits.

There's a real freedom that comes with being happy without reason. It sort of makes you even happier because it means it can't be taken away. It can also turn you into a Warrior of Happy where you welcome the challenges and battle all negativity courageously with hope and love.

I could tell you how I got there so we can all be on the same page, but I'm sure the path is different for everyone. And my road to bliss might not be your's so I don't want to lead you down the wrong path.

I will say that I was somehow shown, through a series of circumstances in the last year, what it is like to have moments where you feel completely comfortable in your own skin and to not want to change a thing about the moment. Those memories I carried with me and turned to rote.

And it's not like I don't worry or get sad or depressed or scared or grieve things like anyone else. It's just that I sort of love that I am capable of those emotions and I realize that what goes up must come down and vice versa in some strange reverse law of gravity. It's like that Bjork song on my MySpace page says right now: "It takes courage to enjoy it, the hardcore and the gentle."

Oh, one more thing.

Just to play the spiri-guru for one second, because I do think it's the most important realization that has brought me to this place: If the amount of joy we are getting out of life is dependent upon the things that happen or don't happen to us... well, we're all just perpetual victims then, aren't we?

The happy is always there. Don't play the victim by letting life get between you and it.