Where Have All The Straight Men Gone?

Richelle Ryan and I went out on the town Saturday night after attending the premiere party for a new indie film I'm featured in called Phone Sex. (More details on that and other upcoming projects later this week.) We went to gay clubs. We went to straight clubs. We went to Jonathan Chang's birthday party at his club, Popular. We went to The Abbey. We went to The Standard. We walked Santa Monica and we walked Sunset. Nowhere -- and I mean nowhere -- was a hot straight guy to be found. The one night Richelle and I decide we're gonna find some hot straight guy to fool around with ("You can have the porn star pussy, but you've gotta get through me too!"), there are absolutely none to be found.

The closest we got was showing the check out clerk at Sav-On Richelle's boobs and totally making his night. His koolaid grin was about the hottest thing we saw all night.

It's not that no one would do it, of course. It's just that we couldn't find any real "straight" guy to tempt. Why is it that even the straight men in Los Angeles seem so gay? Have you noticed that? Everywhere else in America, straight guys look and act straight. But here, they are very pretty, very creative and very in touch with their feminine sides. Apparently you have to go to the really scary parts of downtown to find a good thug. Sucks.

Maybe the beach has some straight surfers? Where does Caleb Carter find his?

Why am I on the prowl for straight men again? The same reason I was when I was 18 - 21. I don't really want to have meaningless hook ups right now. I want a relationship. So if I'm going to have a meaningless hook up, it might as well be safe. And I don't just mean safe by the fact that it would just be oral! I mean, safe that there will be no feelings, strings, chance of a relationship, etc. In other words, if there's a chance that I would actually be able to date the person, we're going to dinner and a movie before hitting the sack!

Okay, so that all seems very convoluted and a really ridiculous way of looking at things now that I've written it out. But that's okay! Straight boys are hot. Period. I've always lusted after the straights. My hottest sexual adventures have always been as a third wheel in sex between a straight couple. Just let me touch and lick wherever I want while you two go at it. Pretend I'm not in the room! That makes me a happy camper. What all of this means psychologically? I'm not sure. I should probably put some thought into it and bore you with an update later.

Oh! You want to know something else completely weird about me? I don't really like to suck dick. I'm a top only, right? I like to get sucked, I like to eat ass, I like to fuck and I like to be really agressive and dominant. But! If it's a straight guy, I will totally suck his dick and want to be submissive. Sometimes I'll suck gay cock, but it has to be really big.

Yeah, my sexual check list is a little weird, huh?

Anyway, Richelle and I had a hot time, but we are looking for a few good straight men who will do "anything" for her pussy... if you know any! ;-)